let’s take charge of it all again (Thursday November 23rd, 2000 - 00:00)
Trying to gently place a few long-lived, comfortable patterns back in to my life.. writing being one of those..
It’s not that a day ever passes without writing some words, but so many at the moment either end up in emails or scraps of paper and so I can’t physically see any effort from the past few months. Life has been a little off center since moving to London, my feet still aren’t quite planted, but trying to redevelop some habits in to my life will surely help.
On November 18, around 1am, I wrote some stream-of-consciousness ramblings. Following are some snippets, un-edited, for no particular reason but to encourage me to write more… so allow me to self-indulge:
I’m looking at the water, these tiny bubbles holding form as best they can and I try not to disturb them. Let them wait their time without my influence. I shan’t bare the death of a foam ball on my already heavy heart.
So aptly the taxi driver said to me tonight : So where do you consider yourself to be from?
In this bath my accent doesn’t bother me. I’m thinking without words so there’s no taints to the words that I stream.
it’s amazing what a difference new pyjamas make. 15 minutes looking through several shops, tried on the bottoms of a nice red and black tartan type worth 25 quid, and they slept like a baby that night.
they reach across the narrow bathroom and tug on the light string.. the room darkens. they reach to the floor, stretching muscles that haven’t felt strain for awhile, groping about, hearing a clink as the lighter touches the bath base. they pick it up, flick the barrel and a circle of light turns the lemon foams to orange ones. Their arm reaches past their toes and lights the wick of a red candle baring a Japanese symbol : they can’t recall what it stood for. Was it fire or peace?