niina.amniisia » bits, pieces and photos from sydney, australia and elsewhere

how to meet the perfect man (by being the perfect woman) (Saturday November 22nd, 1997 - 00:00)

category: mmhuh?

Convince your feet not to smell.
Don’t dribble in your sleep.
Don’t snore.
Never nod off in a bus.
Never have another pimple.
Pee quietly.
Don’t get a run in your stockings.
Speak clearly.
Don’t have a bad hair day.
Be well rested.
Know how to sew.
Be knowledgable.
Have a high paid job.
Keep your nail polish in a perfect state.
Enjoy a beer.
Do not catch a cold.
Be a good cook.
Buy expensive clothes.
Change out of your pyjamas as soon as you wake up.
Learn to have no body odour.
Always ask for a napkin when buying take-away.
Know that you can be wrong some of the time.
Like all music.
Have fashion sense.
Never have PMS.
Be prepared.
Have sex appeal.
Know what to do in bed.
Don’t act innocent.
Don’t always be certain.
Avoid hesitation.
Accept invitations.
Wear in new shoes before taking them out of the house.
Learn to do your lipstick perfectly without a mirror.
Know when to stop.
Use big words only when your company will understand their meaning.
Don’t sit on chewing gum by accident.
Don’t have accidents.
Accept compliments but only with a blush.
Be in the right place at the right time.
And remain single until you meet him.

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